Salutations and welcome to The Spewker, an online news magazine currently in Beta. Regularly updated features focus on politics, celebrities, the media, blogging, contests, gossip, the Maryland region, and life in the United States of America.
The Spewker is and always will be free. The blog offers news, videos, and my own brand of commentary and opinion. Donations are not necessary but certainly welcome. A large subscriber base is needed to move The Spewker to the next phase: launch. The e-mail address or URL used to subscribe will never be sold or spammed; however, there is a disclaimer for the guestbook if you wish to sign.
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The story behind the birth of the name "Spewker" follows this introduction. I hope you enjoy your visit to my site and The Spewker. Thank you and please drop by again soon.
---------------------------------------------------Okay people, listen up. Here's the sad truth about virtual reality: There are no more one word domain names.
They're all taken. Believe me. I tried. For hours upon hours. That's right, TWO FREAK'N HOURS of my life wasted looking up one word domains. I'm here to tell you there are none available. Not unless you want to cozy up to some - ahem - incredibly materialistic individual who, some time over the course of the 1990s, spent the equivalent of five freak'n years looking up words in the dictionary and registering each one as a separate .com.
Imagine sitting down to dinner at that yodel's table. "Come on, darling, come to dinner. Your food is getting cold..." And a voice off in the distance screams back, "Shaddup your fat pie hole and shove it under the door!"
Those one word babies, they're like diamonds in the rough or like panning for gold. Oh sure, there may still be some good one word domains in .org or .info, but why bother? I mean, who's gonna plug a one word name in their browser without the .com tag? Your Aunt Ethel from Florida who doesn't even know how to turn on her computer? Get real.
I started with the word irate. Good sounding name suggested by a close friend who knows how much I love to complain. No such luck. iRater, iRating, iRatings, iRant, iRantings, iRanter, Rant, Rants, Ranter, Spew, Spewer, Spewed, Spewing, Spewings, iSpew, iSpewer, iSpewed, iSpewing, and iSpewings were likewise taken. Hmmmm, maybe a catchy phrase, like trialanderror, hitormiss, comeandgo, beenthere, or donethat might be ripe for the pickings. Nope. Sorry. Taken, taken, and gone. And just so you understand the magnitude of my dilemma, taken.com was likewise GONE.
Then, just like a punch in the groin, it hit me. If I really wanted a one word domain I would just have to make one up. Something original and appealing, yet unpretentious and intriguing. The name would not only have to convey singularity of purpose, namely my inclination to express anger, ridicule, and disgust for just about anything and everything, but also spark enough curiosity in the minds of random surfers and searchers.
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Alas, this was no easy task. No matter how hard I tried to think of something besides "spew" and "rant," the words kept rattling around in my empty brain. Spew. It had a certain ring to it -- all nasty and intriguing -- a real head turner. If I could somehow tweak "spew" into something I could call my own, then I'd finally be able to get on with this tiny labor of love.
And so good people, "Spewker" was born. How I arrived at that name, I don't know. But I liked it. At least I knew that much. It invoked all the right connotations of "spew" while looking startlingly similar to the word "Speaker." Which is, afterall, my calling here in cyberspace. A lone little voice with a gigantic yearning for public discourse . How random is that?
"I'll take it!" I cried to no one in particular (well, the guinea pig was nearby, but he never answers). I began frantically clicking all the little buttons on some domain registration web site, thinking throughout the whole tedious process, "This better go through before some other delusional fool snaps it up." When all was said and done, Spewker was all mine! Sure, I had shelled out about fifty-eight bucks to register my hot little property in four different domains, order privacy protection, and launch this primitive cookie-cutter web site. But at least I had my grubby little hands on a one word domain.
It'd better be worth it.
